Tuesday, January 11, 2011

The incurable disease

I visited a Bible thumping church last Sunday morning. I never would have come near the place if not for an invitation from a minister's wife. The natives of this strange planet were very nice and extremely friendly. There were several handshakes and hugs from young women. It was like a paradise except it was an insane asylum. These incredibly nice people were batshit crazy.

It started with a very attractive woman at a microphone singing some Jeebus songs while everyone else (except me) sang along thanks to the words being displayed on the wall. These people sang pretty good and they really got into it, moving their bodies with the music. The woman at the microphone had a great voice but she unfortunately was as god-soaked as it is possible to be. Between songs she talked about god and Jeebus, constantly repeating herself as if maybe Jeebus didn't get it the first time. If there really was a magic god fairy, it would have been bored to death by these crazy gullible people.

The theme of this church is god loves the human ape species of planet Earth. God guides them and when necessary performs magic tricks for them. Miracles happen all the time, even in the 21st century, but somehow this supernatural bullshit never gets reported in any newspaper.

After the Jeebus songs (was I ever glad when that finally ended) a minister (there were about four ministers there) gave a pretty darn good sermon. I listened to every word because it was about science and I actually learned a few things despite god getting inserted into it for no good reason. The minister would sound like a normal person for a long time, but then he would start praying as if he was talking to god itself. Frequently the church members would say nonsense words like "hallelujah" or "The Word" (the word of god also known as the Bible).

The sermon which was about the branch of science called physics included a lot of Bible thumping with the Bible quotes displayed on the wall. Most of the church members had their own Bibles and they had no problem finding any quote in their Bible in a few seconds.

When the long sermon finally ended it was time for the Hispanics to take over and it was all in spanish including the singing, but this time there was a band with about six musical instruments, including bongo drums played by the minister who is the husband of the lady who invited me there.

I was the only new member. My name was announced and I waved to the crowd who seemed very happy to see me and a song was dedicated to me which was sung in Spanish very enthusiastically, while the lady next to me translated it for me. They were all the nicest people I ever met. It's too bad they were insane. Thank goodness they didn't know I'm an atheist (with an anti-Christian blog).

This experience convinced me it's going to take several more centuries than I thought to eradicate the Christian death cult from Idiot America. Right now it's an epidemic that can't be cured. It's for a good reason only 16% of Americans accept evolution without supernatural intervention. The other 84% are permanently insane and even the best science education will not cure their disease.

2 comments:

  1. It feels good to be loved, even if the people love you are loco. They don't give one whit if any of that shite is right. It feels good and that's good enough for them.

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  2. 'If there really was a magic god fairy, it would have been bored to death by these crazy gullible people.'
    --- Human Ape

    I think that accurately describes Christian(and everyone other religion's) church "services"(like you get any out of churches).

    'Thank goodness they didn't know I'm an atheist (with an anti-Christian blog).'

    Thank atheos(atheos is not a god-fairy) there probably not reading your blog post right now.

    @LadyAtheist I don't think they love him, well in a Jedi sense they do.

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