The election is next year so there have been thousands of articles about healthcare in America. They're doing it wrong. Americans need to learn how stop being sick.

What I wrote at the New York Times:

Americans could spend much less on health care if they didn't eat junk food, smoke cigarettes, and avoid exercising.

I never get sick and I never see doctors. I'm able to do this because I have a very healthy lifestyle. My goal is to never see a doctor for the rest of my life.

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This is what I didn't write at the New York Times:

A large percentage of Americans are obese. We have lots of 500 pounders. (500 Pounds = 226.79619 Kilograms). Americans like to stuff their fat faces with cake.

When I was living in Florida in a condo, most of the residents were very obese. Also, they were assholes. I hated these fucking morons. I saw one woman who must have weighed at least 700 pounds. I'm not making this up. These disgusting people liked to talk as loud as they could so everyone else in the building could hear them. It was nonstop yapping.

Here in this northwestern Illinois farm town, everyone is civilized. There is no noise problem in my neighborhood. It helps that I live next door to a cemetery. Dead people are very quiet.