I wrote this 8 years ago in 2010. Here it is again: Creationists, I'm here to help you.

Creationists, I'm here to help you.

Creationists, first, before I forget, I want to strongly encourage you to read and/or listen to Ken Miller's radio speech HERE, and also please leave a comment there to tell me what you think about it.

OK, creationists. Here's the reason for this post. I'm interested in helping you. It's true that a few dozen times I have called you creationists "fucking idiots" and some other things, but that doesn't mean I'm not interested in curing your disease. I know recovery from your mental illness can be difficult, and in most cases impossible, but it's still important to help you, because the quality of your life is at stake.

It has to be horrible to live in the 21st century, with exciting new scientific discoveries being announced more and more frequently, and not be able to understand any of it, and it must be terrible to be afraid of this scientific progress. It's no way to live a normal life.

If you listened to Professor Miller's speech, you already have some idea of what you've been missing. Now you got to take the next step and learn how evolution works (good news - natural selection is an extremely simple concept), and learn why biologists consider the evolutionary relationship of species to be proven fact. In my blog profile I recommended three books to read, and in this blog there are explanations of the evidence, or links to other excellent websites and videos that will help you understand.

All you got to do is look at it.

Unfortunately some of you refuse to read anything written by atheist biologists. Well, I got some bad news for you there. Religious biologists are extremely hard to find. Ken Miller is a rare exception, and he most certainly is not anywhere close to being a fundamentalist like you evolution deniers.

So if you refuse to listen to atheists, you're never going to learn anything. That's too bad, because when biologists explain the evidence for evolution, or how evolution works, they are not interested in talking about atheism or theism. For them the only thing that's important is the science, and if you want to live in the 21st century, science had better be important to you.

Perhaps you're worried about the religious implications. I'm not going to be dishonest with you about that, unlike some atheists who think being dishonest is a good idea. Dishonesty can never be justified, and lying is always pointless, because everyone knows the liar is lying.

So here's the truth about the religious implications of evolution. There's no denying that the facts of evolutionary biology completely remove an extremely important hiding place for your god-of-the-gaps. When ignorant ancient people started inventing gods, it was almost always their way of explaining the diversity of life. But today there's no excuse to be ignorant, especially when a two second google search can answer any question you could possibly ask.

Creationists, if you're ever going to become scientifically literate, you're going to have to risk losing your god hobby. Not to worry, throwing out medieval ideas does not have to be the end of the world for you. Understanding and accepting reality is very liberating. It's a feeling that can't be described. You have to try it. You will find out how wonderful it is to be a completely free person, no longer in fear of a life after death. No worries about being bored out of your minds in a magical heaven or being tortured in a magical hell. Complete freedom from supernatural bullshit is a wonderful thing. Also, not having any superstitions makes understanding scientific concepts many times easier.

Some or perhaps all of you creationists don't much care for throwing out the magical heaven idea. Your entire life, since before you learned how to walk, you have been brainwashed to believe dead people are magically exported to another place where you get to see Jeebus for trillions and trillions of years. Let's think real hard about that for a minute. Can you imagine how incredibly boring eternity is? Is eternal boredom really something worth looking forward to? You need to understand, creationists, that a magical heaven is only the wishful thinking of cowards. Do you really want to waste your entire life being a coward? Another problem with a magical heaven is it's ridiculous. It's a childish concept that couldn't possibly be true because nothing could be more impossible. If you're ever going to be able to understand scientific concepts, you first must understand that the impossible never happens. You need to understand there's no magic in the universe. And that's what every god ever invented really is, just another word for magic.

Creationists, when you throw out the ridiculous magic-god-fairy idea, your life becomes more challenging because now you have to think. If there's something you don't understand, you can't take the easy way out and say god did it. Not being able to depend on the magic hypothesis, you have to figure out what really happened. Actually there's thousands of scientists who are doing that for you every day, so all you got to do is work hard to understand their scientific discoveries. There's a big advantage to thinking hard - it's very rewarding, many times more rewarding than being lazy and invoking your dead Jeebus for everything.

You will notice that when you become scientifically literate, you will be able to figure out some scientific problems on your own. You will come up with your own ideas, ideas that don't depend on a god's magic wand, ideas that can possibly explain what really happened. And when you can do that, then congratulations, you have become a real atheist, also known as a normal person, completely free of the god disease.

Does throwing out the god idea mean throwing out your moral values? No, the exact opposite is true. As a Christian, you have fake moral values. You act civilized because you think you're being watched by the Magic Man. You think the penalty for fucking up is eternal torture, and you think the reward for not being an asshole is eternal paradise.

But when you become a normal person, also known as an atheist, your moral values are real. You help other people because that's what you want to do, and your moral values are stronger because you're doing good things with no expectation of some reward in a magical heaven. Also, as a normal person, you're no longer brainwashing your children, destroying their minds with insane religious fantasies. There can be nothing more immoral than mental child abuse, but that's what every Christian parent does to their own children every day. The moral values of an atheist, that come from within the person, instead of dictated to them, are the best moral values a person could possibly have.

Creationists, if you're too lazy to think, or too cowardly to join the rest of the world here in the 21st century, you might as well leave now and go read your worthless ancient Bible. But if you're ready to escape from your supernatural fantasies, and if you're willing to do your own research without somebody holding your hand every minute, then I am I here to help you when you need help. And so are thousands of other people, including scientists.

If you have any questions, please leave a comment at any thread, and unless it's obvious you are only interested in wasting my time, I will be glad to help you.

Just one more thing creationists, and this is extremely important. Please don't listen to dishonest atheists who tell you it's perfectly OK to say god invented evolution, or god used evolution to create people, or god guided evolution. They're lying to you because there's nothing OK about polluting biology with theistic bullshit. It just makes you look stupid, and it's an insult to biologists to stick magic into their branch of science.

A god fairy's magic wand is not a mechanism of evolution. A magic fairy did not invent evolution and it does not use evolution, for the same reason fairies didn't invent and don't use gravity. Evolution is a completely natural process. If you can't accept evolution as pure science, you should stay out of it, continue living in your everything-is-magic fantasy world, and leave biology alone. There's nothing more ridiculous than accepting a scientific concept and then polluting it with supernatural bullshit.

The wimpy atheists who dishonestly tell you it's OK to stick god into evolution are insulting you. They are saying you're too stupid to accept science without magic.

If you're too brainwashed to completely give up the magical god idea, that's fine as long as you don't stick your fantasies into biology. People who make evolution their god-did-it religion disgust me more than creationists. Actually theistic evolutionists are creationists because they invoke a magical creator, and that makes them worse than the most brain-dead fundamentalist. And theistic evolutionists are really evolution-deniers because there's no theistic bullshit in science. Please keep science pure or stay away from science completely. Thanks.

There's another thing I forgot to mention. If you're going to spend a lot of time studying evolutionary biology, you should first ask yourself if can you accept some scientific facts without becoming mentally disturbed. For example there's the fact that the development of the human ape species was not inevitable. Any number of things could have prevented the existence of modern human apes. For example if not for an asteroid that smashed into earth 65 million years ago, there would be no apes at all, because our tiny mammal ancestors who shared this planet with dinosaurs would still be tiny mammals hiding underground to avoid becoming a dinosaur's lunch. That asteroid could have easily hit Jupiter instead, a massive planet that has been our solar system's vacuum cleaner for more than four billion years. Even after the dinosaurs were wiped out, anything could have happened to prevent the development of people 65 million years later. Natural selection is not random, but there's some luck involved in the development of any species.

Another scientific concept that could make you become mentally disturbed is our close evolutionary relationship with the chimpanzee apes, with who we share an ancestor who lived only about six million years ago. Also, it's extremely important to understand that not only did we develop from ancient apes, we are still an ape species, just like our close cousins the chimps are still an ape species. People are apes, and the dead Jeebus was just an ape. If that fact disturbs you, you should stay away from science, and you should just waste the rest of your life reading your worthless Bible.

However, if you let reality make you crazy you are making a big mistake. For me it's wonderful to know I'm just an ape. Knowing this scientific fact makes everything else make sense.

This would be a good time to quote Ken Miller who said in his Rhode Island radio speech: "We may be animals, but we are not just animals. We are the only ones who can truly appreciate, as Darwin put it, that there is grandeur in this view of life."