A question I answered at Yahoo Answers: How do confessions work?

Bless me father for I have sinned. It has been one half century since my last confession.

In the last 50 years I have murdered thousands of people with a small sharp knife. Every morning I eat a baby for breakfast. I steal everything I want. And I have been ridiculing the magic jeebus man every day.

Priest: Say 3 Hail Mary's and 3 Our Fathers.

Thanks priest. See you in hell.

Or something like that.

It's been 50 years but I think I remember most of the idiotic nonsense.

Source:
Nine years of being brainwashed by ugly nuns in a Catholic school.